A favourite quote and a way by which to approach life.

Today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday.

Thursday, 8 May 2008

Don't try this at home

Before I get started on what I actually want to write about this evening, I thought I'd just give you a progress report. Basically I'm still going downhill and I don't think it'll be long before I'm in hospital, but for now I'm still at home and getting tired and frustrated.

Now then ...

As a severe asthmatic whose often in hospital I'm frequently offered friendly pieces of 'advice' on how my asthma might be cured. Now my consultant is rather knowledgeable about asthma, seeing as he writes the national treatment guidelines for asthma, so what I want to know is if these things that are suggested are really that wonderful, why on earth doesn't my doctor tell me about them? The answer: These so-called cures are a load of rubbish! One of the big give aways is the word 'cure' itself, as there is no cure for asthma. The other give away is that some of the suggestions are just plain weird and wacky. Here are some that I've come across (only a few of them have been suggested to me, others are things I've heard be suggested to other asthmatics or have read about):

1. Live at sea. Not by the sea, but at sea.
2. Inhale hydrogen peroxide.
3. Play the violin.
4. Have seven sessions of head and face massage.
5. Eat pink marshmallows.
6. Drink organic cranberry juice.
7. Sit in front of a 125 watt infrared light (with an aluminium shade).
8. Omit sugar from your diet.
9. Drink two tablespoons of apple cider vinegar four times a day.
10. Drink a small glass of warm/hot water mixed with cayenne pepper, followed by lots of cold water. [Oh, now why would you need the cold water!]
11. Have a cold shower everyday.
12. Inhale the smell of a freshly cut lemon, then eat a quarter of it (including the peel, pith and pips), and drink a glass of water.
13. Live your life wearing a dust mask.
14. Chew on dehydrated dog poo!!!

I don't think I'll be giving any of them a go any time soon, and I don't recommend it to anyone else either.

Any more for any more?


ginge said...

living at sea sounds like something fun to try and one of the few that you aren't allergic/possibly allergic to!
ahoy there and shiver me timbers!

Anonymous said...

Dehydrated what?????? You've got to be kidding!

I suppose you should be grateful that's it's dehydrated ;-)


BeckyG said...

Andy, I wish I were kidding, but alas, this is what some strange folk will have you believe/make themselves believe in the vain effort for a cure. Or maybe they just like to make people go 'Eeeeeew!'. Or perhaps they're thinking that if it won't cure you then it'll kill you, in which case you won't have asthma any more, and therefore will be cured ... Am I rambling now? ;oP

No, really, don't try it. Don't even think about trying it. Don't even be too grateful that it's dehydrated.


BeckyG said...

Hi Ginge, I guess living at sea would be okay for a bit, but it's a bit isolated and rather a long way from hospitals in the event that it turns out not to be be a cure for asthma. You might be right though, that it might be something that I'm not allergic to. Hang on, I'll go off and invest in a pirate's hat, a wooden leg and a hook hand so I can practise looking the part before I decide whether or not to give it a go.