A favourite quote and a way by which to approach life.

Today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday.

Saturday, 14 May 2011

Home and away

I made it home from hospital! I'm not 100% well, I'm still having some renal difficulties, and I'm still terribly swollen with water retention, but I'm okay enough to be out of hospital. Hospitals are great places to pick up infections too, so the sooner one can escape the better, especially if your immune system is suppressed, as mine is from the huge doses of long-term steroids. I'm already a chronic carrier of MRSA, and I don't need anything else to take advantage of my vulnerability. Besides which, I was getting miserable just from being in hospital for so long (18 days I think) and with the various complications that had already occurred. Being MRSA positive is great for getting you your own room (you have to be isolated from other patients) and therefore some privacy, but spending 18 days mostly on your own with life-threatening things happening to you, and on the back of your step-brother's suicide, is not always the best thing for one's mental health. Yes, in that respect I was more than ready to come home, and as I've said before, there's a certain amount of physical getting better that I believe can only happen once you get home anyway. So I escaped yesterday (Friday) evening around 5pm I think it was, and was sat on the sofa with Zach purring all over me 15 minutes later >^..^< I did a huge amount of nothing last night, although W popped by to see how I was doing, and I began to think about coming away.

Last year we had a family holiday in North Yorkshire over my mum's birthday - a gathering of the clans consisting of Mum and J (step-dad); my brother M, his wife, N, and their boys, O and D; my brother C and his wife S; and me. We all had such a lovely time at the cottages we stayed at that we decided to do the same thing again this year, albeit a few weeks later than last year's trip, and this time with the addition of C's and S's 12 week old baby, J. It was planned for this week, and still happening whether or not I'd be able to make it because of being in hospital. It was looking unlikely that I'd be able to go and I think the prospect of missing out was perhaps adding to some of my miserable feelings of the past few days. I have made it though! I am currently in a cottage called 'Badger' in a place not very far from Thirsk in North Yorkshire. My nephews O and D are asleep in the room next to me, although they took a lot of settling tonight, and only eventually went off to sleep after many times of being put back to bed and the last thing O (4) was heard to have to said to D (2 1/2) was, 'That's it, D. I don't think I can do any more rampaging tonight.' :oD Mum and J are asleep in the room across the landing. The rest of the clan are over in the other cottage we've rented here, 'Fox'.

I had a slow morning this morning, gently gathering things together; sorting out meds; stroking Zach; being purred on by Zach; being eaten by Zach (he wasn't at all happy to see me packing a bag so soon after such a long disappearance, and he was definitely letting me know of his disgruntledness); going to the post office to collect a parcel I'd missed being delivered whilst in hospital; making bread to bring away; sorting out some OU stuff; and filling the car with petrol. All very relaxed. All quite tiring given that I only got out of hospital yesterday evening and didn't sleep brilliantly as I never do on my first night out of hospital. I then pootled off southwards at about 4pm, arriving 66 miles away from home about an hour and a half later. The drive was easy with very little traffic, which reduced the number of crazy drivers to negligable. I have to say that I was quite exhausted by the time I got here, and I haven't been out of the cottage since landing, but I'm hoping to be able to relax, unwind, destress, recuperate, heal, and renew my spirit with this family time in the countryside. I will have to do some study while I'm here as I have the final essay for my undergraduate degree with the OU to do. It's supposed to be in by 27th May. I've applied for an extension because of my hospital admission, but after my experience of being refused last year despite being very ill I don't hold out much hope. Anyway, it'd be good to get the essay (ECA - End of Course Assessment) done and sent on time if at all possible, even if it's not going to be my best work. I have to keep reminding myself that I only need to pass this course, and that the level of pass doesn't affect the classification of degree I'm going to get as I've done things backwards (as is my way) and I'm finishing my degree with the foundation course I should've started with, and foundation courses don't contribute to degree classification. Of course it'd be lovely to get a Distinction if I could (and my overall course assessment scores fall well into this bracket), but it doesn't affect anything if I don't, so I actually only need to get 40% in the ECA to pass it, rather than 85% for a Distinction. So yes, I have to do some study while I'm here, but I also need to let myself be restored in body, mind, and spirit. The past few weeks have been very difficult. Here's hoping I can go home on Thursday feeling more like myself.

1 comment:

Dawn said...

I'm so glad that you made it out of hospital!
I hope you have a lovely, relaxing time away and return home feeling much better :-)
Dawn xx