A favourite quote and a way by which to approach life.

Today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday.

Monday, 30 May 2011


Two of my friends got married on Saturday.  It was a lovely wedding and C, the bride, looked beautiful.  The occasion, though, reminded me of a conversation I had with my mother a few weeks ago.  It was a very surreal conversation, and one that you should probably never have with your mother.

I'll be graduating with my under graduate degree this September (I just sent off my last essay today!) and I'm having a party to celebrate.  My mum suggested the party when I was in hospital sometime last year or the year before, and it was just before my most recent admission that I started to organise the party and send out invitations.

Mum and J are very kindly paying for most of the party, and it was while we were discussing some of the costs that this surreal conversation took place, beginning with her saying, 'Of course, if you decide to get married next year then we'll have to have a re-think about finances.'

????????  'Yeeees, but I need a man, and a relationship with a man, before getting married becomes a possibility.'

'Hmmm.  Have you thought about maybe going to Thailand and getting a Thai bride?'

??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????????!!!!!!!!!! 'No.  I can honestly say that I haven't.  And Mum, I'm not gay.  You do know that, don't you?'

'Yes, it's just ... Well, I thought with your liberal views, and all that...'

?????!!!!!!!????????  'Er.  Um.  Right.  I see.'  NO, I DON'T!!! What liberal views in particular????  'Well, um, I'm not gay, and I'm not going to Thailand to get a wife.'

'Oh.  Okay ... So you won't be getting married next year?'

'No, I think that's very unlikely.  Lovely as it would be to be getting married, I do want to marry a man, and I want it to be a man I love.'

I have no idea where that idea of hers came from, and I have to say that I felt as though I ought to be apologising for being straight.  I'm also rather perplexed as to why she seemed to think I might want a bride!  And a Thai bride!  This is the woman who was anxious about me being well enough to go to North Yorkshire, so I have no idea where this notion of me jetting off to Thailand came from.  And a bride from Thailand!!!   The conversation seems so wrong in so many ways.

Completely surreal.  Totally bizarre.


Kate said...

!!! I can only relate this to my own conversation with my husband about the future savings we make for our first daughter:

me: "Well, it would be nice to have something in store for if she gets married."

my husband: "She might be gay."

me: "And ...?"

my husband: "Well, then we wouldn't have to pay for a wedding."

me: "Why do you think she wouldn't want a wedding if she was gay?"

Bearing in mind that said daughter was all of a few weeks old at this conversation ...!

B said...

... wow. that puts some of my bizarre conversations with my mum into perspective :)

... a Thai bride? I can't say I've EVER thought of that as a possibility for ANY of my friends :)

BeckyG said...

LOL Kate, that must have been a very weird conversation! Definitely in the same category of weirdness as mine with my mother.

B, you don't know how much of a relief it is for you to say that you never expected any of your friends to consider getting a Thai bride LOL ;o)