... tomorrow was supposed to be my big day in court as (non)witness to the crime of the millennium. I'd been hoping to be home from hospital by now, but obviously I'm not, so my next hope was that I'd be able to have a trip out - just what everyone in hospital needs: a morning trip to the court room ;o) However, the doctors have today decided that I'm not well enough to go to court in the morning, and you know, I'm oddly disappointed. I was intrigued. I wanted to see the magistrate try to keep a straight face while they heard the evidence against the holey watering can thief, and heard me say that although I'd been called as victim and witness of the crime, I actually heard nothing or saw nothing, and knew nothing about it until I'd been alerted of the event by my neighbour. It has been pointed out to me that as 'victim' of the crime my statement/testimony may well be necessary for to proceed in court, if only to say that it was my watering can and that I didn't give anyone to enter my property or take the watering can. There is hope yet that my curiosity will be satisfied.
I was supposed to be arriving at court no later than 9:30 am, which means that I/the doctors are going to have to contact the courts as soon as they open to explain that I won't be able to be there. I'm guessing this will annoy the holey watering can thief - and possibly my neighbour A (key witness to the events) - as they're unlikely to be told of any postponement until after they've arrived. I'm sorry if I upset A, but not so sorry about annoying the holey watering can thief ... except that he obviously knows where I live ... ;o)
I hope that the courts are understanding in my inability to attend and the very short notice I/the doctors will be giving them. The original documents I received came with a form that I had to sign to say whether or not I'd be attending, but also said that if I didn't attend then I could be arrested! This whole thing is so ridiculous that somehow I wouldn't be surprised if I were to find myself being cuffed to a police officer by my hospital bed tomorrow afternoon. Unlikely it may be, but I fear it's not beyond the realms of possibility.
So the big questions are:
1. Will I be arrested for non-attendance at court as (non)witness to a crime I knew nothing about until after the event?
2. Providing I'm not arrested, will the case go ahead without me tomorrow?
3. Will the case be postponed so that I can give my non-evidence, satisfy my intrigue, and bring you a satisfactory conclusion to the whole affair?
4. Will the holey watering can thief be so annoyed at having his case postponed that he hunts me down, beats Wilfred to a pulp and makes another attempt at holey watering can theft?
So many questions, and all night to ponder them ... in the dark ... all on my own ...